The kind of coffee they'd only serve in prison. Typically rhymes with Faxwell Mouse, or Dolgers.

 

And that's a step up. When I first started here, the lady in charge of the coffee was buying these monster tins from the dollar store. Something called Butternut. The smell alone made me ill.

 

Needless to say, I have my own coffee maker in my office.

I call it "desperation coffee."  I'm cheap, I drink it every day here because it's free.

The kind of coffee they'd only serve in prison. Typically rhymes with Faxwell Mouse, or Dolgers.

 

And that's a step up. When I first started here, the lady in charge of the coffee was buying these monster tins from the dollar store. Something called Butternut. The smell alone made me ill.

 

Needless to say, I have my own coffee maker in my office.

Honey I don't know anything about prison.  I have no plans to go there, you get one "uniform" - the same uniform the others have -  that would drive me over the edge.

 

I am drinking brown liquor at 4:30 PM in the office.

 

See those orange "jumpers" don't work with my skintone!  I'd have to find someone to braid my cornrows, every week.

 

I am drinking brown liquor at 4:30 PM in the office.

 

See those orange "jumpers" don't work with my skintone!  I'd have to find someone to braid my cornrows, every week.

 

I'm sure there would be a surprising number of people capable of providing that service.

 

And not to get too off topic...if we're discussing prison in the media, no such discussion would be complete without the phrase "I want a goodbar!!"

 

http://www.badmovies.org/movies/penitentiary/penitentiary4.wav

 

So, to bring this back around...I like coffee.

...  I'd have to find someone to braid my cornrows, every week.

 

If some big guy thinks you're pretty, he'll make someone else braid your cornrows to keep you that way. :-)

 

Edit:

The worst coffe is served in hospitals. It's always decaf (there's a reason; more about this later), cheap stuff at that, and weak. It's like river water only without the nutrients.

 

During my most recent hospital adventure (October '07), after I was disconnected from myriad wires, tubes, and machines and was moved from the ICU to a regular surgical care unit and sort of ambulatory if I had something or someone to hang onto, my good friend Chris came to visit me. I had managed to change from my hospital gown into my own very-best pajamas so that I could traverse the corridors without my butt hanging out, so we decided to go to the cafeteria/snack shop off the main lobby.

 

I hadn't had a cup of coffee in more than a week, and that was what I wanted more than anything else -- a cup of strong, black, Colombian coffee with just a teaspoon of sugar. It was heaven! I finally was able to accept that, yes, there is life after surgery. Chris and I sat at a table and chatted and watched people for a while, and soon after we made our way back to my room, a nurse came in. She looked at my cup and asked incredulously, "Just what is that?!"

 

"Coffee," I replied, thinking, "Now that's a dumb question. What does it say on the cup?"

 

Then the lecture began, all about caffeine being immuno-suppressive and I was in a very fragile, vulnerable state and it could endanger my life. Chris caught just as much hell as I did, for being an enabler, and neither of us was surprised about that; not the first time we got in trouble together. He's 30-plus years my junior and I've been a misguided mentor and he an apt pupil since he was in his late teens. Rather than either of us being a moderating influence, we egg each other on like a couple of dogs on the loose.

 

I did take the lecture to heart, and abstained from further caffeine indulgence until my doctor gave me the go-ahead some three or four months later. Ever since, I've been trying to compensate for missed caffeine intake.

...  I'd have to find someone to braid my cornrows, every week.

 

If some big guy thinks you're pretty, he'll make someone else braid your cornrows to keep you that way. :)

 

Eeek!  He might have ulterior motive, and MTS, as X would say, "don't swing that way"!

 

If I had to go to the Pen, I'm not going to anybody's bitch!  The man is going to have to put me in solitary confinement, as I'll be naked.  I refuse to wear a synthetic blend!

 

 

I am drinking brown liquor at 4:30 PM in the office.

 

See those orange "jumpers" don't work with my skintone!  I'd have to find someone to braid my cornrows, every week.

 

I'm sure there would be a surprising number of people capable of providing that service.

 

And not to get too off topic...if we're discussing prison in the media, no such discussion would be complete without the phrase "I want a goodbar!!"

 

http://www.badmovies.org/movies/penitentiary/penitentiary4.wav

 

So, to bring this back around...I like coffee.

Penitentiary?  Oooooooooooooooooooooo, you are old school!

 

I too like coffee, just not in a synthetic blend orange jumpsuit!

 

It must mean something that the thing that bothers you the most about that youtube song is the synthetic blend orange jumpsuit!

 

It must mean something that the thing that bothers you the most about that youtube song is the synthetic blend orange jumpsuit!

 

 

I don't do synthetic blends or uniforms.  That is my breaking point.  When my father told me that he was sending us to Benedictine, it sent me over edge. 

 

We hosted a dinner for the "school rep" (ie coach), and another other family "talk" about us kids attending Benedictine.  When the father of the family attending, asked me was I looking forward to wearing a uniform to school daily, I responded, "I would not be caught in the same outfit as "you people."  I had the the exact same situation as Andy had in The Devil wears Prada.  The look my mother (who was seated directly to my right at the head of the table) gave me was so severe I could feel the flesh melting right off of my body.  Thank goodness my grandmother has quick recovery. I thought that was the last day of my life. 

 

MTS and uniformed do not compute!  It's not happening!  Period!

"Then the lecture began, all about caffeine being immuno-suppressive and I was in a very fragile, vulnerable state and it could endanger my life."

 

I can only imagine whatever poor nurse who is assigned to me - the loved ones will be sneaking in good coffee, good beer, and chocolate-dipped coconut macaroons. And I pity the fool who tries to give me grief about it!

"Then the lecture began, all about caffeine being immuno-suppressive and I was in a very fragile, vulnerable state and it could endanger my life."

 

I can only imagine whatever poor nurse who is assigned to me - the loved ones will be sneaking in good coffee, good beer, and chocolate-dipped coconut macaroons. And I pity the fool who tries to give me grief about it!

 

All while you're doing cornrows at MayDay's Sho Nuff Salon and Cornrow Emporium.

I couldn't get the actual funny or die link to work

 

http://eater.com/archives/2011/10/04/insufferable-coffee-snobs-parodied-by-funny-or-die.php

 

^LMAO that's hysterical, and why I hate going into those independent coffee places; in addition to how the "regulars" seem to make you feel like you're an alien who's invaded their private space (Mud Coffee in the E. Village is like that). To top it off, they're usually even more expensive than Starbucks and half the time the coffee is never as good as they claim. If you've ever been the the Porto Rico Importing Co. in the Village (though technically not a coffee bar, I know), this is exactly how the employees act; that is, if they can be bothered to even wait on you at all! http://www.portorico.com/store/

^LMAO that's hysterical, and why I hate going into those independent coffee places; in addition to how the "regulars" seem to make you feel like you're an alien who's invaded their private space (Mud Coffee in the E. Village is like that). To top it off, they're usually even more expensive than Starbucks and half the time the coffee is never as good as they claim. If you've ever been the the Porto Rico Importing Co. in the Village (though technically not a coffee bar, I know), this is exactly how the employees act; that is, if they can be bothered to even wait on you at all! http://www.portorico.com/store/

 

I think it depends on the establishment.

 

I miss my "pal" coffee.  Things 1 & 2 went out for coffee and we were having a meeting and Thing 1 said, "oh I need to show you this...." and brought this video up while they sipped on their coffee.  BASTARDS!  Why did I hire them?!

Okay, we're deciding what to do in our new building. 

 

What's the verdict on Keurig?

Okay, we're deciding what to do in our new building. 

 

What's the verdict on Keurig?

 

Are you getting consumer models or commercial models?

 

Why did I open this, now I want coffee!  UGH!!

Okay, we're deciding what to do in our new building. 

 

What's the verdict on Keurig?

 

Are you getting consumer models or commercial models?

 

Why did I open this, now I want coffee!  UGH!!

 

This is just a few of us in one section of the office, so probably consumer model.  Does it do a good job quality wise or is it "glorified instant"?

I think they make a passable cup of coffee. I don't own one because frankly I feel guilty about throwing away all those pods, but outside of that I like the system. You can adjust strength, you can pick from a million different coffee brands, so everyone gets exactly what they want.

 

One of my former co-workers bought one for his office because he couldn't stand the office prison coffee, and now apparently his office has become the local convening point. THey call it the 'Brew & Stew'. <insert polite chuckle here>.

Okay, we're deciding what to do in our new building. 

 

What's the verdict on Keurig?

 

Are you getting consumer models or commercial models?

 

Why did I open this, now I want coffee!  UGH!!

 

This is just a few of us in one section of the office, so probably consumer model.  Does it do a good job quality wise or is it "glorified instant"?

It's about as good as drip coffee (or maybe slightly better), but faster. If you buy cheap pods, you'll get crappy coffee, if you buy nice pods, you'll get decent coffee.

 

My mother bought a couple dozen of them off craigslist last January from old people that had gotten them for Christmas and had no idea what they were for 10 or 20 bucks each and then has been selling them throughout the year at a nice profit. I turned one down because I like my french press too much to switch over, plus I hate the waste of the pods. They really are a lot more convenient though.

My brother in law just bought a coffee company and now he's trying to convince me that this thing is the only way to go when brewing coffee.

 

I typically use my french press at home, or I have an automatic drip w/ a built in grinder that works nicely too (although cleaning it is a PITA)

Not sure if it was mentioned but I use this;

 

http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=aero+press&tag=hydsma-20&index=aps&hvadid=11280868434&hvpos=1t1&hvexid=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=246411362848684048&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=b&ref=pd_sl_5fukyus3zy_b

 

Phenomenal coffee!!!

Should I be concerned that coffee makers are more and more resembling drug paraphernalia?

^Strictly speaking, I think coffee makers are drug paraphernalia.

 

I agree completely with Keith.  Keurig coffee with decent pods is fine for most coffee drinkers.  Though like him I enjoy the ritual and thrift of the french press.

You want to talk about ritual. I think if I start this process now I can have coffee in the time it takes me to grow the same moustache our demonstrater has.

 

BAREFOOT COFFEE // CHEMEX on Vimeo

those Chemex coffeemakers are great. I remember using one thirty years ago, but gradually you never saw them again, although they've made a comeback and are selling for around (I think) $40 or so (maybe more). A couple of years ago I saw one in a thrift store in good condition for $7.00 and I didn't buy it, which I regret. I've started using a regular Melitta manual drip maker--same basic principle (which were big in the 70's and hardly ever see anymore either!). I was using a press (Bodum) for a long time, but it's messy to clean and despite how good and rich the coffee is, the method produces (according to the "experts") a rather unhealthy brew; which is not to suggest that coffee in itself is unhealthy. Just read the latest report!

 

Personal Health June 25, 2012

Having Your Coffee and Enjoying It Too

By JANE E. BRODY

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/06/25/having-your-coffee-and-enjoying-it-too/

^Strictly speaking, I think coffee makers are drug paraphernalia.

 

 

Haha.

 

I'm only 25 and I already drink less coffee than I used to. I attribute it to my past issues with lack of sleep and think it probably induced panic attacks of the past. I used to drink coffee all throughout the day. I just drink a small cup in the morning, now. Nothing like waking up in the morning, drinking a cup of coffee while blasting music through the headphones.

I can honestly drink coffee any hour of the day with no issues to my sleep. I have been drinking it since I was a kid and my wife can't even understand how I'm not a insomniac lol.

You want to talk about ritual. I think if I start this process now I can have coffee in the time it takes me to grow the same moustache our demonstrater has.

 

BAREFOOT COFFEE // CHEMEX on Vimeo

 

That Salvador Dali Mustache is creeping me out. I bet he prepares his Opium-Poppy Tea the same way.

Nothing like waking up in the morning, drinking a cup of coffee while blasting music through the headphones.

 

You think blasting music through headphones first thing in the morning might have something to do with your panic attacks?? If it was Debussy or Vivaldi that would be relaxing, but if it's more like Drowning Pool or Limp Bizkit then I think you have a probable cause! Don't blame the java!

I can honestly drink coffee any hour of the day with no issues to my sleep. I have been drinking it since I was a kid and my wife can't even understand how I'm not a insomniac lol.

I was like that till my late 20s and then started getting more and more sensitive to caffeine. Yesterday I had a can of diet coke at lunch and the caffeine kept me up half the night. So now I'm feeling groggy from lack of sleep and am tempted to go across the street and buy a regular coffee to wake up. The problem with that is that it would keep up tonight, so that tomorrow I'd be even worse. Aging sucks.

^ I was immune to coffee, until I cut off soda, coffee, etc., for a couple years. Now it affects me roughly like it's supposed to (it's still maybe a little weak, but I can't just drink a cup and reliably go to bed right after). But if I drink a lot of it in a short period, the tolerance comes back very quickly.

I can honestly drink coffee any hour of the day with no issues to my sleep. I have been drinking it since I was a kid and my wife can't even understand how I'm not a insomniac lol.

 

My kind of guy!

... Aging sucks.

 

To clarify your perspective on that sentiment, contemplate the alternative.  :-)

... Aging sucks.

 

To clarify your perspective on that sentiment, contemplate the alternative.  :-)

Staying young and sexy till I die in my sleep at 90? I think I could live with that.  :wink:

I can honestly drink coffee any hour of the day with no issues to my sleep. I have been drinking it since I was a kid and my wife can't even understand how I'm not a insomniac lol.

 

I used to be like that.  sniff...sniff. 

 

    Coffee...I miss you. 

all the little hipsterish coffee shoppes are using those things on the side for boutique coffee plantation 'pour over' cups of coffee lately. they make a big show of brewing it, then you have to wait and of course its expensive. i've even seen $25 cups of coffee offered that way, sheesh!

^I love the way those independent coffee places always boast that their coffee is superior to Starbucks. It's not. Half the time it's worse, and even more expensive! There's a chain in the East Village called The Bean which has started expanding a lot. They just opened a location near me, a really beautiful place. I finally tried the iced coffee, hoping for the best (since it's literally down the block). It sucked!

^I used to have a pretty good opinion of Starbucks, but it seems to me that either their quality is going down, or my tastes are changing. (Probably both)

i remember some neighbors using a chemex coffee maker in the 70s. they were kind of hippies lol. now they are back for expensive 'pour overs!'

 

i just remembered another fancy coffee shop acoutrument, the clover press machine. i think starbucks is pimping this lately too as a way to charge more.

 

what i dont see much of anymore are the big old fancy italian espresso machines, with the eagles and scrolling on them. all those nirvana/shoegazer era coffee shops used to have them, but they seem to have disappeared. it seems like the new independent shops prefer modern machines over those, or more likely they are cheaper.

 

anyway, for home we have a delonghi coffee maker and like it a lot. we buy beans and use a burr grinder in the am, which the neighbors do not like a lot!!

 

 

^lol, we put our burr grinder in the window early in the morning when we're mad at our neighbors for late night noise.

yeah, I think the quality of Starbucks has gone down over the years too. Mainly that's probably because of the rapid expansion, especially in New York. As far as those Clover machines are concerned, they do make better coffee, but that's also dependent on who's making it. I once had a really crappy cup made from one by someone who really didn't know what he was doing. I should have just stuck with the regular brewed coffee, which, when made properly at Starbucks (and hasn't been sitting around too long) can stilll be excellent. Again, my experience with those independent coffee places has been less than stellar, with the exception of Mud Coffee in NY which is generally outstanding--that is, if you can stand the Cheers-like hipsterish ambience :-P

After fiddling with a French press for a while (no complaints about the coffee it made), I realized that life doesn't need all that complication or expense. I can get exactly the same result by microwaving a cupful of water and then pouring it into a small stainless-steel saucepan where I've already added the fresh-ground coffee and letting it steep for four minutes. Then, I pour the coffee into the cup (already preheated by microwaving the water) through a tea strainer. Add sugar, splenda, or stevia, and a couple of spoonfuls of powdered nonfat dry milk if I take a notion to (and sometimes a tablespoon of Jack Daniels). To me there's no discernible difference and the cleanup is simpler. :-)

^I've done that before too, but didn't consider the cleanup to be simpler (about the same IMO) plus it requires access to a sauce pan.

I found this doing my research:

 

http://www.dearcoffeeiloveyou.com/love-keurig-nope/

 

I almost went right out and bought one as a result.   :evil:

If any of you greener folks want an example of how not to convert non-true believers to your way of thinking, check it out.

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/video/apple-nasa-engineers-create-heat-controlling-coffee-maker-17359351

 

One of my friends from back in Cincy was just on Good Morning America. Apparently he has perfected the taste of coffee through brewing temperature regulation. He's getting a lot of publicity. ABC, Yahoo!, hell, an article about this contraption was on the front page of BBC for God's sake. That's pretty cool.

 

He was talking about the online trolls having a field-day, commenting on how the NASA Engineer came up with the technology and the guy from Apple, (him) came up with the high price ($11,111.00). I had to admit, that's pretty funny!