I sometimes find myself laughing hard at this website (and sometimes find it dumb), though it's actually more jokes centered on "stuff liberal white New Englanders like", not so much flyover white people. Understand this is all comedy and it sometimes goes far out there (may be offensive to some). The whole concept of the site is placing racial stereotypes on white people. It reminds me a lot of Chappelle's style of humor. Check out the website. There are over 100 entries. http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/

 

Here are some examples from the website:

 

Saint Patrick’s Day

 

Normally if someone were to wake up at 7:00 in the morning, take the day off work, and get drunk at a bar before 10:00 a.m., they would be called an alcoholic, and not in the artistic, edgy way that white people are so fond of.

 

On March 17th, however, this exact same activity is called celebrating St. Patrick’s day. This very special white holiday recognizes Saint Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland who helped to bring Catholicism to the Emerald Isle. His ascetic life is celebrated every year by white people drinking large amounts of Irish-themed alcohol and listening to the Dropkick Murphys.

 

It is also the day of the year when you can make the most gains in your social and professional relationship with white people.

 

Most of the time, white people consider celebrations of European heritage to be racist unless they omit large swathes of the 16th through 20th centuries. But since the Irish never engaged in colonialism and were actually oppressed it is considered acceptable and encouraged to celebrate their ancestry. For this reason, 100% of white people are proud to claim that they are somewhat Irish.

 

A big part of St. Patrick’s Day is having white people feel particularly upset at the oppression of their ancestors that has in no way trickled down to them. If you find yourself talking with a white person who tells you about how their great grandfather was oppressed by both the English and the Americans, it is strongly recommended that you lend a sympathetic ear and shake your head in disbelief. It is never considered acceptable to say: “but you’re white now, so what’s the problem?”

 

It is also worth noting that on this day, there is always one trump card that never fails to gain respect and acclaim. When you are sitting at an Irish bar and someone orders a round of Guinness, you must take a single sip and while the other white people are savoring their drink, you say: “mmmm, I know it sounds cliche, but it really is true. Guinness just tastes better in Ireland.”

 

This comment will elicit an immediate and powerful response of people agreeing with your valuable insight. This statement also has the additional benefit of humiliating the members of your party who have not been to Ireland (and thus cannot confirm this proclamation). Having not traveled to Ireland and consumed a beer that is widely available in their hometown and throughout the world, they will immediately be perceived as provincial, uncultured, and inferior to you...http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/03/16/89-saint-patricks-day/

 

Grammer

 

White people love rules. It explains why they get so upset when people cut in line, why they tip so religiously and why they become lawyers. But without a doubt, the rule system that white people love the most is grammar. It is in their blood not only to use perfect grammar but also to spend significant portions of time pointing out the errors of others.

 

When asking someone about their biggest annoyances in life, you might expect responses like “hunger,” “being poor,” or “getting shot.” If you ask a white person, the most common response will likely be “people who use ‘their’ when they mean ‘there.’ Maybe comma splices, I’m not sure but it’s definitely one of the two.”

 

If you wish to gain the respect of a white person, it’s probably a good idea that you find an obscure and debated grammar rule such as the “Oxford Comma” and take a firm stance on what you believe is correct. This is seen as more productive and forward thinking than simply stating your anger at the improper use of “it’s.

 

Another important thing to know is that when white people read magazines and books they are always looking for grammar and spelling mistakes. In fact, one of the greatest joys a white person can experience is to catch a grammar mistake in a major publication. Finding one allows a white person to believe that they are better than the writer and the publication since they would have caught the mistake. The more respected the publication, the greater the thrill. If a white person were to catch a mistake in The New Yorker, it would be a sufficient reason for a large party....http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/05/12/99-grammar/

 

Juno

 

Juno, starring Halifax’s Ellen Page, is a critically acclaimed comedy about a wise cracking teenager, dealing with an unexpected pregnancy. As 2007’s Indie hit, it is alternative mainstream and white people love it when low budget movies do well, even though the $7 million budget is enough to feed thousands of villages in East Africa for a year. White people, especially ones over 30, also love movies that take them back to a time when there was zero hip hop influence in white high schools. So although the character of Juno and her high school are very unrealistic, older people identify with her and wish that their unappreciative children would be more like her.

 

On another note, the film takes place in a fictional suburban town in Minnesota, but imagine the same storyline in say West Baltimore or Socorro, TX. My guess is that there would be less qurkiness, less acoustic guitar and zero references to Dario Argento. Teen pregnancy is not as big a problem in the suburban midwest as it is in urban centers or border towns, therefore it is acceptable to not only green light a movie shedding light on teen pregnancy but it is okay to laugh at the situation and add a killer indie soundtrack.

 

It also doesn’t hurt that the screenplay was written by somebody named “Diablo” and that Jason Bateman and Michael Cera are in the movie as well.

 

p.s I’m not a robot, I cried when Vanessa got her baby

 

Marijuana

 

People from many cultures like marijuana (South East Asian, Jamaica, India, Morrocco, Mexico, etc), but white people take it to an entirely new level.

 

To simply purchase, roll and smoke marijuana is not enough for white people. They need to make sure they know all the different strains, cultivation technique, and methods for smoking it. They even have an entire magazine devoted those where they actually have centerfolds of plants that people have grown.

 

White people are also willing to spend over $500 on smoking devices just to find new and more expensive ways to smoke weed...http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/01/27/33-marijuana/

 

Diversity

 

White people love ethnic diversity, but only as it relates to restaurants.

 

Many white people from cities like Los Angeles, San Francisco and New York will spend hours talking about how great it is that they can get Sushi and Tacos on the same street. But then they send their kids to private school with other rich white kids, and live in neighborhoods like Santa Monica or Pacific Palisades.

 

But it’s important to note that white people to do not like to be called out on this fact. If you run an ethnic restaurant you can be guaranteed repeat business and huge tips if you act like your white customers are adventurous and cultured for eating food that it isn’t sandwiches or pasta.

 

Gentrification

 

In general, white people love situations where they can’t lose. While this does account for the majority of their situations, perhaps the safest bet a white person can make is to buy a house in an up-and-coming neighborhood.

 

White people like to live in these neighborhoods because they get credibility and respect from other white people for living in a more “authentic” neighborhood where they are exposed to “true culture” every day. So whenever their friends mention their home in the suburbs or richer urban area, these people can say “oh, it’s so boring out there, so fake. In our neighborhood, things are just more real.” This superiority is important as white people jockey for position in their circle of friends.

 

They are like a modern day Lewis and Clark, except instead of searching for the ocean, they are searching for old properties to renovate.

 

In a few years, if more white people start moving in, these initial trailblazers will sell their property for triple what they paid and move into an ultramodern home.

 

Credibility or money, they can’t lose!

 

When one of these white people tell you where they live, you should say “whoa, it’s pretty rough down there. I don’t think I could live there.” This will make them feel even better about their credibility and status as neighborhood pioneers. http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/02/22/73-gentrification/

 

Yeah, I love this site. What makes it funny is that it's all true and us whitey's know it.

... grain fed free range meat ...

 

That should be "grass-fed free range meat.

 

And I'm pretty sure there was already a thread about this.

^Yes, and Yes.

 

Many of the individual entries are well written observations about certain trends/interests/whatever that are shared by some portion of the mostly white educated urban middle/upper middle classes (not just New Englanders- even Ohioans), but I don't think the concept really hangs together.

marks like the third time this blog has come up on this website....

^ Must be because all the white people around here enjoy seeing offensive statements directed at white people.

The site is hilarious. I've posted a few random articles in the off topic thread. I don't see any reason to be offended; we all know that not ALL white people fit those stereotypes, mostly just upper middle class liberal yuppies

^ Must be because all the white people around here enjoy seeing offensive statements directed at white people.

 

Funny because one of the articles talks about how white people love to be offended hehehe

I always have to check back at CDawgs posts an hour later since they're usually 10x as long by that point

What IS it with white people and Dave Chappelle?  I mean, I know he's hilarious but it's like they picked him to be the "funny black guy" that replaced Chris Rock.  Maybe that should go into the stuffwhitepeoplelike...

I agree with the commentary on the first post ... these jokes seem to be about New Englanders more than white people in general. All the stereotypes fit them perfectly, but not necessarily whites in other parts of the country.

 

The "White Problems" section is the best.

 

"Should children be allowed to drink wine?"

 

"Typos on menus"

I think the website "stuff white people like" (which comes from a liberal New England viewpoint) is not damaging to the majority group.

 

I disagree.  It seems to promote the idea that all white people are pampered, petty, clueless, and fake.  I suppose it is no more or less damaging than jokes about eating watermelon and chicken wings, hiding from the INS, or riding camels.  At the very least, it helps to poison the notion that we should try to show some mutual respect.

Well, as long as you've rationalized the racist humor, have at!

I haven't read this site in a while, but it is a good laugh. It's funny how it has inspired spin-offs like Stuff Asian People Like and Stuff Educated Black People Like. IMO, it is tastefully done and doesn't seem terribly demeaning.

 

I sometimes find myself laughing hard at this website (and sometimes find it dumb), though it's actually more jokes centered on "stuff liberal white New Englanders like", not so much flyover white people.

 

I agree.

C-Dawg

 

This longtime lurker and sometime poster always enjoys your posts, sometimes I'm a little

annoyed with them, sometimes I'm a little offended, but I always read them for their entertainment value. What annoys me is that there are some posters out there who, trying

to keep their posting numbers up, usually answer with a damn one word response that is supposed to make sense.

 

C-Dawg

 

This longtime lurker and sometime poster always enjoys your posts, sometimes I'm a little

annoyed with them, sometimes I'm a little offended, but I always read them for their entertainment value. What annoys me is that there are some posters out there who, trying

to keep their posting numbers up, usually answer with a damn one word response that is supposed to make sense.

 

 

Definetely!

I've been a fan of stuffwhitepeoplelike for a while now and I am frequently amazed at the outrage it inspires in some. Scanning the comments, you find white people expressing genuine offense. I've even heard the site debated in earnest by black bloggers on PRI's "News and Notes" as if it's some kind of explosive commentary on race in America.

 

It's satire, and damn good satire at that. The fact that it pisses people off is a testament to its genius.

 

 

I've been a fan of stuffwhitepeoplelike for a while now and I am frequently amazed at the outrage it inspires in some. Scanning the comments, you find white people expressing genuine offense. I've even heard the site debated in earnest by black bloggers on PRI's "News and Notes" as if it's some kind of explosive commentary on race in America.

 

It's satire, and damn good satire at that. The fact that it pisses people off is a testament to its genius.

 

I'm frequently amazed at the offense a lot of people take to a lot of things, but that doesn't make it unoffensive.  I mean, the sh!t storm that happened after Fuzzy Zoeller jokingly said to the media to tell Tiger not to have fried chicken and collard greens at the Master's winners dinner...just as harmless and non-voilent as any of this...but it was still a problem.

 

And the idea that since it pisses people off it must be genius?  I mean, I'm sure we can all start telling jokes here that will really piss people off if we want...I guess we're all geniuses.

The reason whites get offended by this sort of stuff--and we’re talking about elitists of a certain…uh…persuasion here: i.e. limousine liberals!—is that they take themselves so seriously--daring to mock their pretensions and good intentions. I found the stuff about Whole Foods particularly funny—save the world by buying tomatoes at $8.99 lb! And what about those environmentally correct paper bags? On the rare occasion I shop there—usually for a quart of milk—they give you one of those large, boxy bags and I walk out feeling like a dork (okay, maybe it’s not the bag in my case). Unfortunately this practice has caught on at Trader Joe’s (no slouch in the p.c. department either, but otherwise the “Poor Man’s Whole Foods” ). Whenever they would ask me “paper or plastic” I would always subversively ask for the latter; but lately that option doesn’t seem to exist. And hey, aren’t those paper bags great in a blinding rainstorm? One final note: What’s wrong with having a grammar obsession?? Eats, Shoots, and Leaves can be a great beach read…even if you never go to the beach.  I guess I’m even whiter than I thought.

I've been a fan of stuffwhitepeoplelike for a while now and I am frequently amazed at the outrage it inspires in some. Scanning the comments, you find white people expressing genuine offense. I've even heard the site debated in earnest by black bloggers on PRI's "News and Notes" as if it's some kind of explosive commentary on race in America.

 

It's satire, and damn good satire at that. The fact that it pisses people off is a testament to its genius.

 

I'm frequently amazed at the offense a lot of people take to a lot of things, but that doesn't make it unoffensive.  I mean, the sh!t storm that happened after Fuzzy Zoeller jokingly said to the media to tell Tiger not to have fried chicken and collard greens at the Master's winners dinner...just as harmless and non-voilent as any of this...but it was still a problem.

 

Except that Zoeller's joke is rooted in hundreds of years of institutionalized hatred. Also, it's not terribly clever.

Another important thing to know is that when white people read magazines and books they are always looking for grammar and spelling mistakes. In fact, one of the greatest joys a white person can experience is to catch a grammar mistake in a major publication. Finding one allows a white person to believe that they are better than the writer and the publication since they would have caught the mistake. The more respected the publication, the greater the thrill. If a white person were to catch a mistake in The New Yorker, it would be a sufficient reason for a large party....http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/2008/05/12/99-grammar/

 

I actually came across a typo in The New Yorker a while back. It did feel pretty good.

^As far as I'm concerned, if you can't take a joke, don't dish them out.

I don't think these are funny, and it has nothing to do with being offended.  Putting "White People Like (insert any word here)," is hardly "genius."  Really, you can put any suffix you like and someone could come up with 2 paragraphs on how it relates to caucasians.

I'm more offended on being termed a "flyover white,"  than anything.

^As far as I'm concerned, if you can't take a joke, don't dish them out.

I don't think these are funny, and it has nothing to do with being offended.  Putting "White People Like (insert any word here)," is hardly "genius."  Really, you can put any suffix you like and someone could come up with 2 paragraphs on how it relates to caucasians.

I'm more offended on being termed a "flyover white,"  than anything.

 

"White people like CUP" = Not Funny.

 

"White people like BEING OFFENDED" = Comedy Gold.

OPTIONS TRADING?!  what about Top Siders?!?

Unpaid Internships

 

In most of the world when a person works long hours without pay, it is referred to as “slavery” or “forced labor.” For white people this process is referred to as an internship and is considered an essential stage in white development.

 

The concept of working for little or no money underneath a superior has been around for centuries in the form of apprenticeship programs. Young people eager to learn a trade would spend time working under a master craftsman to learn a skill that would eventually lead to an increase in material wealth.

 

 

Using this logic you would assume that the most sought after internships would be in areas that lead to the greatest financial reward. Young White people, however, prefer internships that put them on the path for careers that will generally result in a DECREASE of the material wealth accumulated by their parents.

 

For example, if you were to present a white 19 year old with the choice of spending the summer earning $15 an hour as a plumber’s apprentice or making $0 answering phones at Production Company, they will always choose the latter. In fact, the only way to get the white person to choose the plumbing option would be to convince them that it was leading towards an end-of-summer pipe art installation.

 

White people view the internship as their foot into the door to such high-profile low-paying career fields as journalism, film, politics, art, non-profits, and anything associated with a museum. Any white person who takes an internship outside of these industries is either the wrong type of white person or a law student. There are no exceptions.

 

If all goes according to plan, an internship will end with an offer of a job that pays $24,000 per year and will consist entirely of the same tasks they were recently doing for free. In fact, the transition to full time status results in the addition of only one new responsibility: feeling superior to the new interns.

 

When all is said and done, the internship process serves the white community in many ways. First, it helps to train the next generation of freelance writers, museum curators, and director’s assistants. But more importantly, internships teach white children how to complain about being poor.

 

So when a white person tells you about their unpaid internship at the New Yorker, it’s not a good idea to point out how the cost of rent and food will essentially mean that they are PAYING their employer for the right to make photocopies. Instead it’s best to say: “you earned it.” They will not get the joke.

 

I bet we could put together a pretty good "Stuff insert Ohio city People Like"  around here.